Sunday, March 20, 2011

Condoms Are About To Get A Lot More Disturbing

That disturbing photo to the right of Gene Simmons' face is a condom adorned with a picture of Gene Simmons' face. It is, according to the company that produces it, the first FDA-approved condom with a full color image on it. But it will not be the last. The Washington Post reports that the company, Graphic Armor Inc., is "in talks with entertainment companies, energy drinks and designers to put logos and messages on the condoms." Ahhh!

Obviously, this is disturbing for a lot of reasons, but I'd like to tackle two in particular.
1. When it comes to sex, condoms are the supporting actors, not the stars. They're not supposed to be fun and silly. They're tools. They're supposed to serve their utilitarian purpose and then get tossed out the car window. There's a risk in making condoms the star of the show, and that's distraction. Could you imagine how much of a mood killer it would be to rip open a condom and have Gene Simmons staring back at you?
2. Penises are not billboards. Advertising has already invaded nearly every aspect of life. Can our penises please be left alone? I know that companies gotta hustle, but putting the name of an energy drink on a condom and, therefore, a penis is like some kind of Orwellian nightmare. Please, leave penises alone.

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